The world's leading London pub-based fantasy football league
| Guzman, N | ARG | £ 3.00 |
| Varane, R | FRA | £ 12.00 |
| Stones, J | ENG | £ 4.00 |
| Hector, J | GER | £ 7.00 |
| Pique, G | ESP | £ 10.00 |
| Milivojevic, L | SRB | £ 2.00 |
| Fernandinho | BRA | £ 0.50 |
| dos Santos, G | MEX | £ 0.50 |
| Iwobi, A | NGA | £ 0.50 |
| Maria Sharapova | BRM | £ 24.00 |
| Suarez, L | URU | £ 26.00 |
| £ 89.50 |
| de Gea, D | ESP | £ 20.00 |
| Benatia, M | MOR | £ 3.00 |
| Koulibaly, K | SEN | £ 0.50 |
| Milenkovic, N | SRB | £ 0.50 |
| Kante, N | FRA | £ 7.00 |
| Goretzka, L | GER | £ 5.00 |
| Cahill, T | AUS | £ 1.00 |
| Casemiro | BRA | £ 3.00 |
| Lozano, H | MEX | £ 14.00 |
| Vardy, J | ENG | £ 7.00 |
| Messi, L | ARG | £ 38.00 |
| £ 99.00 |
| Courtois, T | BEL | £ 16.00 |
| Mendy, B | FRA | £ 2.00 |
| Varela, G | URU | £ 2.00 |
| Otamendi, N | ARG | £ 0.50 |
| Grigori Rasputin | BRM | £ 14.00 |
| Ozil, M | GER | £ 11.00 |
| Milinkovic-Savic, S | SRB | £ 0.50 |
| Cuadrado, J | COL | £ 1.00 |
| Jedinak, M | AUS | £ 0.50 |
| Jesus, G | BRA | £ 24.00 |
| Silva, An | POR | £ 9.00 |
| £ 80.50 |
| Muslera, F | URU | £ 8.00 |
| Vertonghen, J | BEL | £ 16.00 |
| Marcelo | BRA | £ 22.00 |
| Soares, C | POR | £ 7.00 |
| Kroos, T | GER | £ 16.00 |
| Isco | ESP | £ 19.00 |
| Lingard, J | ENG | £ 5.00 |
| Banega, E | ARG | £ 0.50 |
| Zielinski, P | POL | £ 0.50 |
| Musa, A | NGA | £ 2.00 |
| Kramaric, A | CRO | £ 0.50 |
| £ 96.50 |
| Neuer, M | GER | £ 21.00 |
| Ramos, S | ESP | £ 17.00 |
| Mascherano, J | ARG | £ 4.00 |
| Sidibe, D | FRA | £ 0.50 |
| Arias, S | COL | £ 0.50 |
| Alli, D | ENG | £ 23.00 |
| Rakitic, I | CRO | £ 11.00 |
| Mikel, J | NGA | £ 4.00 |
| Paulinho | BRA | £ 8.00 |
| Batshuayi, M | BEL | £ 2.00 |
| Seferovic, H | SUI | £ 0.50 |
| £ 91.50 |
| Patricio, R | POR | £ 10.00 |
| Vrsaljko, S | CRO | £ 0.50 |
| Rudiger, A | GER | £ 0.50 |
| Cahill, G | ENG | £ 0.50 |
| Moreno, H | MEX | £ 0.50 |
| Pogba, P | FRA | £ 15.00 |
| Flores, E | PER | £ 3.00 |
| Iniesta, A | ESP | £ 7.00 |
| Higuain, G | ARG | £ 28.00 |
| Firmino, R | BRA | £ 18.00 |
| Falcao, R | COL | £ 5.00 |
| £ 88.00 |
| Schmeichel, K | DEN | £ 0.50 |
| Godin, D | URU | £ 5.00 |
| Miranda | BRA | £ 0.50 |
| Mercado, G | ARG | £ 0.50 |
| Glik, K | POL | £ 0.50 |
| Sterling, R | ENG | £ 9.00 |
| Moutinho, J | POR | £ 0.50 |
| Honda, K | JPN | £ 0.50 |
| Werner, T | GER | £ 32.00 |
| Griezmann, A | FRA | £ 28.00 |
| Mertens, D | BEL | £ 0.50 |
| £ 77.50 |
ABANDONED Saudi Arabia flag bunting will be flown at London’s leading pub-based fantasy football World Cup auction next Tuesday (12 June) to ‘celebrate diversity and inclusion’.
The decision was taken by the Kenna League after it emerged on Monday (4 June) Greene King has ordered its pub leaseholders to remove the Saudi Arabia flag from its World Cup bunting.
“All the countries of the World Cup need to be recognised. When we heard Greene King were removing the Saudi flag from its bunting we knew straight away we should make a statement to celebrate diversity and inclusion,” said the Kenna League chairman.
“A World Cup without Saudi Arabia is like a Bloody Mary without horseradish,” continued the chairman. “Who could forget Saeed Al-Owairan running from his own half to score against Belgium in Washington in 1994?
“Or the time…um…you know…when they…err…lost 8-0 to Germany in Sapporo in 2002.”
According to reports in the media, Greene King removed the flag because the Arabic writing reads ‘There is no God but God, Muhammed in the messenger of God’ and ‘some people in London said’ it may cause offence being shown in premises serving alcohol.
“We’re ‘some people in London too’ and according to Wikipedia, the sword represents strictness in applying justice. We think this is absolutely in line with our values of upholding the Titus Bramble ruling,” said the chairman.
The decision by Kenna HQ has divided opinion on Twitter, with two people ‘liking’ the idea but one user taking a different view.
they say ignorance is bliss so I can see why you’re so proud of yourself
— zephyr neat (@zephyr_neat) June 4, 2018
“We could see this Twitter user was particularly interested in the concept so we invited them to take part in next week’s auction,” said the chairman.
“Then we saw he’d used exactly the same comeback to another tweet on the same issue. With that lack of creativity and low number of Twitter followers this person is surely born to be a Kenna manager.”
they say ignorance is bliss..you must be ecstatic
Islam and alcohol is a no no and the verse on the flag is exclusively Islamic..simple— zephyr neat (@zephyr_neat) June 4, 2018
The Dmitri Kharine World Cup 2018 auction begins at 7pm on Tuesday in a Shepherd Neame pub in the City of London.
The Kenna League vice chairman, who is running an auction for the first time, has assured the league it is entirely up to managers themselves whether they would like to be ‘doped’ or ‘poisoned’ by drinks laced with MDMA.
Unless they Bramble.
THE Pikey Scum manager scooped the Kenna champions prize pot and his fourth manager of the month award winning the season on the weekend.
Walthamstow Reds took the Krakow Cup winnings due to two factors, his manager of the month performance in April and a dodgy decision by an independent inquiry panel.
Having won the Kenna twice before, the Sporting Lesbian manager could not rally his side sufficiently to win again but did take runner up spot and three manager of the month awards.
Two Goals One Cup, Lokomotiv Leeds and Piss Poor complete the cash prize winners.
“At this time of year it’s customary to remind those with new-found wealth the Kenna Foundation relies on donations to support managers with their substance misuse,” said the Kenna chairman over a tube of polystyrene cement.
The domestic season over, all eyes now turn to the Dmitri Kharine World Cup auction scheduled to take place on Tuesday 12 June.
For the first time the vice chairman is taking the reins of the auction, and gossip is rife about his plans for the event.
One rumour maintains he plans to ‘poison’ managers with spiked drinks in reference to the recent attack on a former Russian national in Salisbury.
Although should it come to pass, one suspects the vice chairman would make would be less KGB and more Bill Cosby.
Pikey Scum – £190 (Champions: £150, MOTM x4: £10 x4)
Walthamstow Reds – £85 (Cup winner: £75, MOTM: £10)
Sporting Lesbian – £80 (Runner up: £50, MOTM x3: £10 x3)
Two Goals One Cup – £35 (Third place: £25, MOTM: £10)
Lokomotiv Leeds – £10 (Wenger Trophy: £10)
Piss Poor – £10 (MOTM)
WALTHAMSTOW Reds beat Wandsworth Network Solutions by nine points in one of the poorest-quality cup finals in living memory.
A goal from Wilfred Zaha and unremarkable appearances from Butland, Ake, Pogba, Redmond, Carroll and Mounie were enough for Reds to beat off a WNS side missing six players.
A promising Krakow Cup campaign ended with a whimper for the runners up. Aubameyang scored, but Pereyra (2), Sissoko (2), Depoitre (1) and Morgan (-2) left spectators wondering how the team got there in the first place.
An even dimmer view is being taken of the Reds manager’s road to the final, the outfit having lucked through a controversial independent panel review at the semi final stage.
The hashtag #HollowVictory was trending on Twitter for much of Sunday night and continued into Monday morning as the lucrative Far East market awoke to the news.
‘I don’t care how hollow this victory is…TROPHY,’ posted the Reds boss on the Kenna Whatsapp group earlier today after confirmation came through of his first piece of silverware since entering the Kenna League at its beginnings in 2005.
‘I’d like to thank the independent panel members for their wise decision.’
That sideshow over, all eyes now turn to this week’s top scorers and champions elect Pikey Scum who extended their lead at the top of the Kenna to 52 points thanks to a brace from Harry Kane (12) and all sorts of heroics from Andrew Robertson (15).
A maiden Kenna title for the Scum manager after 12 seasons of trying is expected to be ratified after the match at Wembley on Saturday.
Walthamstow Reds 19 – 10 Wandsworth Network Solutions
Full scores available from The Rub.
