EMERSON World Cup organisers have admitted funny fantasy football team names will be harder to come by this summer than previous tournaments, and launched an appeal for ideas.
Talking to assembled journalists outside league headquarters this morning, the chairman said despite Brazil’s rich culture and history Emerson boffins had failed to come up with anything as amusing or inappropriate as the 2012 Emmanuel Olisadebe Euros tournament two years ago.
“We’ve had our top minds putting their heads together for the last three days and the best they’ve come up with is ‘Copa Lallana’, ‘Kappa-Wearers’ and ‘Just Like Watching Alan Brazil’. It’s a bit embarrassing really,” lamented the chairman.
Other names to come out of the Emerson think tank include: ‘Christopher Samba School’, ‘Man or Manaus’, ‘Rio de Mistrugstessed’ and ‘Just Like Watching Savile’ – the last a reference to the childhood innocence of many Emerson managers in the 1980s.
“Two years ago Poland and Ukraine had the social shortcomings and unfortunate 20th Century history which meant inappropriate team names were easy to come by,” reminisced the chairman. “And the 2010 Dr Khumalo World Cup, well, I can tell you our lawyers are very happy those weren’t published online.”
The admission has led to fears the Emerson will simply not be as irreverent as previous tournaments.
The chairman this morning launched an appeal for anyone with a sense of humour to come forward with team names ahead of the Emerson auction, which is scheduled to take place in a London pub on Thursday 12 June, the evening of the opening game.
The 2014 Emerson World Cup is sponsored by Soul Glo: Let Your Soul Shine Through.
San Paulo di ganio
Waxon wacksoff
For Brazil he should play Danny Collins