Ronaldo Cokes up chairman’s form

EVERY Kenna manager knows one, hard-learned fact of which executives at Coca-Cola would do well to take note: never bet against Cristiano Ronaldo.

Which is why it was strange at last weekend’s Euros Super League auction the chairman’s decision to pay £25m for the Portuguese was met with mockery.

Ronaldo’s brace, alongside a Vladimir Coufal clean sheet and assist puts ‘Chairmany‘ top of the table after one round of games.

The chairman’s side also achieved the exceptional feat of seeing all eleven players make an appearance, the only side in the Euros Super League to do so.

The Dark Lord lurks behind, the £37m for Romelu Lukaku (the most expensive player at the auction) immediately warranted with two goals.

Tournament debutant, but domestic cup competition specialist, the Clotted Cream First manager occupies third place, but mainly through the efforts of autofilled player Raphael Guerreiro.

‘I’m looking forward to the Friday night game,’ said the chairman. ‘Although I’m meeting the Cowley Casuals manager in a pub serving Deya Steady Rolling Man two hours before kick off so I just hope I remember it.’

Euros Super League – round one*

Full scores available from The Rub.

*Due to an admin glitch Cowley erroneously have Coufal up front rather than Arnautovic, so they are fourth, not third.

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Author: The chairman

Ascended to the chairmanship of the Jeff Kenna League Fantasy Football League in 2007 after co-founded the league in London in August 2005.